Monday, May 12, 2014

Birdo, Saying Goodbye Forever

New skill acquired! I can now make frame-by-frame GIFs, Brother Brain-style, from old video game sprites that I extracted myself from old video games. I have learned how to do this for no other reason than that I wanted to see if I could, and I did.

Take that, voices in my head.

Yes, it’s everyone’s favorite gender-vague bidedal dinosaur, Birdo, modified from frames from the NES version of Wario’s Woods, a puzzle game that holds the record for being the final licensed title ever released for the original Nintendo console as well as the only one in which Nintendo let Toad have a starring role. Wario’s Woods is kind of a garbage bin of unloved Nintendo characters, and features quite a few who hadn’t made a dent elsewhere. (Remember, Wario was still a relatively new character when the game came out back in 1994.) Birdo appears as Toad’s helper.

I suppose having Birdo peace out on an indefinite loop could be a commentary on Nintendo’s decision to ditch her for the new Mario Kart game in favor of head-scratchers such as Baby Rosalina and the monstrosity that is Pink Gold Peach.

I’m not bitter, but I do think it’s weird how Nintendo stocks their games with clone characters when they have a healthy roster of originals. But whatever: a new Mario Kart is a new Mario Kart. Here are my predictions for future Mario Kart contenders: Aged Mario, Fat Luigi, Undead Peach, Baby Undead Peach, Zinc Baby Mario, Titanium Baby Bowser, Embryonic Toad, See-Thru Dr. Mario, John Leguizamo Version Luigi, Gay Pride Yoshi, Never-Stops-Screaming Daisy, Feral Donkey Kong, Alopecia Mario, and, of course, a female Mario and Luigi named Marta and and Luisa. In fact, I can’t believe those last two haven’t happened yet.


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