I think we have a new contender for worst song ever: the 1984 recording “Banana” by someone calling herself Jane Chiquita.
If the pairing of name and subject matter seem a little on the nose, then you too may be questioning whether this could be a joke. Or maybe it’s just some poor woman’s realization of her banana-centric destiny, at which point she, having completed the task for which she was sent to Earth, simply stopped existing. What I’d like to think — what I’m hoping, really — is that the song is about dicks and the suits in the studio said, “No, Jane, you can’t record a song just about dicks, even though this is Italy,” and so she was all, “Fine. Let’s make it about flesh-colored swords. No, wait — bananas! That’s easier to rhyme.” Because I can’t wrap my head around anyone thinking it would be a good idea just to make a song about how much they like bananas, though it wouldn’t be the first time someone had been tricked into singing about dicks.
Me being shortsighted, I took Latin as my foreign language, and so I can’t be sure what she’s actually singing about? Is this song in Spanish or Italian? Can someone smarter tell me if the lyrics are filthy? Or is it just a celebration of potassium?
I know it's been 11 years but...
ReplyDelete- The song was written by Italians and is mostly in Italian, except for a line which is mixed, "me gusta la banana": "me gusta" is Spanish for "I like" of course, but "banana" in Spanish should be "platano" as far as I know. It was pretty common to throw in some random Spanish words in silly eighties pop, for an "exotic twist" :)
- Yes, the song is probably about dicks, not explicitly but definitely not in a subtle way either: it's chock-full of cheap double entendres (as you might have guessed by the cover). These are the full lyrics translated into English:
Banana
I like banana
It's as sweet as honey
It's to die for
If you eat banana
It'll lift you up
Banana
American banana
Its heart needs to be peeled
It's got love inside
As hot as the sun
On bamboo islands
Banana you to me
banana me to you
Same thing together you and me
I'm the peel
You're the sweet insides
Let's get wetter so we don't end!
Banana
Yellow banana
Africa is near
The swing of a vine
The scratch of an hyena
A book by Hemingway.
Banana
What a banana night
You fall from the stars
You feel the chill on your skin
What a banana pizza
We'll never sleep again.
(Lines that don't make sense in English don't in Italian either, so don't blame my translation please :D )