With “It” Being Eyes That Have Seen It All

Should Bjork ever locate the mythical Ice Crystals of Jólasveinn and achieve full use of her snow elf powers, she’d surely master the art of shapeshifting. And were she to transform into an animal that conveyed her full Bjorkiness, that animal would surely be the gerenuk, the African gazelle known for standing on its hind legs and appearing magical. Why, you may ask, would the single most famous Icelander become a animal that inhabits the dry scrub of East Africa? Because of this:

The smirk. The dark eyes. The glint suggesting that both are actually trickster spirits masquerading as earth creatures. Actually, I’m not sure that gerenuk isn’t already Bjork in disguise.

By the way, if you haven’t heard the album Bjork recorded when she was eleven years old, you’re missing out. A sample:

Who Wore It Better? — previously:

• Lena Dunham / Little Critter
• Kim Kardashian / a sex robot from a vintage Japanese comic book
• Fiona Apple / some other chick wearing an octopus hat
• Kris Jenner / Eclipso
• Michael Cera / Edith Crawley
• Lana Del Rey / Camilla Rhodes
• Tabatha Coffey / an angry, white cat
• Grace Jones / a cassowary
• Coco / the Venus of Willendorf