Monday, March 10, 2014

Neighbours

(What follows is an imagined dialogue that I’m sure happened exactly as I state it.)


“Oh, why good day to you, Mrs. Florimello! I have come to you in dire need of assistance! Have you any blackberry jam which I could spread upon my morningbreads?”

“But goodness gracious, Mr. Puddingwood! I have none to speak of, for I enjoyed the very last of mine on my own morningbreads just one hour ago. I ate it all up, I did, with my velvety grey tongue!”

“Well, if anyone should enjoy the last of your jams, Mrs. Florimello, I’m glad it was a soul as agreeable as you! Then I shall don my woolen hat and be off to Jeremy Noofington’s cottage at once, in hopes that he has jam to spare!”

“I wish you luck, Mr. Puddingwood! And a joyous St. Waltrude’s Day as well!”

“Tut-tut!”

{ fin }

2 comments:

  1. Anonymous7:57 PM

    OMG I just found your page and I'm laughing my ass of at this one right now, you sir are a misinterpreted genious. (not native so= bad grammar)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You can compliment me with whatever level of English fluency you choose.

      Delete