The Fate of Spider-Pig?

This is my belated review of The Simpsons Movie.

Fanboy ranting aside, I must say that The Simpsons Movie marked one of the better movie-going experiences I've had in a while. In addition to the Marge Simpson mask that I left the theater with, I can happily report that the film gave me a good 80 minutes of laughter — plus one moment of genuine concern when Julie Kavner surpassed the usual limitations of cartoon voice acting and, for a moment, really made me think Marge had decided to leave Homer forever.

I'm writing this now, when most of my readership has gone out and seen The Simpsons Movie, in hopes that I'd hear what you all thought. Though it amounted to as much as I could have hoped for from such a film, I have a few small critiques:

• The lack of Mr. Burns. Easily my favorite character on the show, Mr. Burns's unabashed evil is something I look forward to. He has perhaps an even smaller role than even Flanders, which is a bit of a shame.
• Other marginalized characters: Agnes Skinner, Moe, Apu, Patty and Selma, Groundskeeper Willy, Kirk Van Houten, Mrs. Krabappel, and Santa's Little Helper.
• General focus on the Simpson family at the expense of the supporting characters. I realize that though I've laughed more at Homer than anyone else, the supporting roles make the show — especially the ones I perceive as either "predators" or "prey." And some of the ones who received airtime instead? Very strange. Lindsay Naegle? Really?
• Total absence of Rainier Wolfcastle, as near as I can tell. Of course, President Arnold Schwarzenegger is basically the same character. But… you know.
• And what, for the love of God, happened to poor Spider-Pig (a.k.a. Harry Plopper)? Did he die with the collapse of the Simpsons' home? I need closure on the character whose theme song has been stuck in my head all weekend.
• Lamely, I read somewhere that the movie's creators tried to work in every character who has every been depicted as a resident of Springfield and therefore tried to catch as many non-speaking background characters as possible. Is it just me, then, or did I see Astrid Weller — Isabella Rossellini's character from the episode in which Homer makes outsider art — at a disproportionately high frequency?
  

Ralph Wiggum, however, appeared in precisely the amount he needed to. And Dr. Nick Riviera joining the likes of Maude Flanders, Bleeding Gums Murphy, Snowball II and Bea Simmons? A very welcome touch.

Mario Athletic

Some pretty cool stuff, I suppose, in this high-speed clip of some Super Mario World acrobatics.

The Return of Jumpman

He shall jump again. And die again. And probably swing a hammer again.



There's an awesome article up on ArcadeShop.com about one of the better Mario-related fan projects I've come across — a homebrewed sequel titled Donkey Kong 2: The Return of Jumpman. Jeff Kulczycki of ROMHACK has apparently gone through the considerable effort of creating a full-on sequel to the original arcade Donkey Kong, complete with four new levels. From what little is glimpsed in the screenshots, the game plays more or less like the original game, just with more bells and whistles. The best part: The revamped ROM goes on sale on August 20 at ArcadeShop.com.

Some screens of the new levels:

the foundry

the mixer (note the "pies" from the original game)

the crane

and the incinerator

In short: too cool.

Small Feet, Big Steps

We took Dante to the beach near the Bacara today. Nothing could better describe the afternoon that the following photos.

You may notice the large black birds in the last few frames of the slideshow. (Well, technically, the last two are me, shirtless, attempting to wash sand off Dante at the showers and getting my torso clawed in the process. But the birds are damn close to the end, let me tell you.) The birds, which Spencer thinks may be cormorants of some sort, squatted on rocks at the edge of the beach, looking juts a little like unpleasant old women, perhaps those who cluster together and do sinister things in Greek mythology. They didn't seem the least bit intimidated by my presence and only set out for the ocean when they felt hungry.

Despite their shiny wings, the cormorants — or possible pseudo-cormorants — walked to water instead of flying. Their gait struck me as rather odd, so I shot a video of one returning back to the rocks. Here it is, in three installments.

Don't get me wrong. Dante was by far the start of the outing. But there's something just slightly creepy in the way that those birds walked, almost as if they were poorly mimicking how humans move.

Where the Bloodbath Happens

Until I saw them without international martial artists hopping around in front of them and clobbering each other, I never realized how beautiful these backgrounds to old Capcom fighting games really were.

In order: Dan's Thailand stage from Street Fighter Zero 2, B.B. Hood's wartorn ghetto stage from DarkStalkers 3 and Ryu's dojo from Street Fighter II.




[ More: The Sigil of Slateman ]

The The (Not the Band)

Not to gloat, but I have a pass to see The Simpsons Movie tomorrow — that is, a full day earlier than the general public. In looking at film's title on the ticket itself, however, I noticed its verbal awkwardness.

Being the translation of the TV show The Simpsons into a film, it poses a problem. The "the" at the beginning of the show's title — which, in my experience, is more often pronounced, as opposed to just saying "I'm watching Simpsons" — has to vanish. Though it's technically correct if you're speaking the title as it's used on the show, you should probably refrain from calling it The The Simpsons Movie, even if it is The Movie version of The Simpsons. And you sure as hell can't say The Simpsons Show Movie or The Movie Version of The Simpsons or even The Simpsons' Movie. I guess you could just treat the title The Simpsons like it's a unit, modifying Movie, but even then I think it's curious that the internal italics of the original TV show title get absorbed by the italics of the movie title when the TV show is ostensibly being referenced in the movie title.

It would have been so much easier if they just called if The Simpsons: Viva Rock Vegas.

The Can-Do Girl

As I mentioned in an earlier post, Moe, the girl who survived a kangaroo attack in Sydney and whose Independence Day arrival back in California was celebrated by me with eye-puss fireworks, has asked me to burn her CDs of music I listened to during the period in which she was gone. I have made three CDs, each burned by theme. These are the CDs. They represent what I've been listening to listening to for the last year and a half or so.

MOE CAN DANCE

1. Bees - "Chicken Payback"
2. Chromeo - "Needy Girl"
3. Le Tigre - "I'm So Excited"
4. Stephen Malkmus - "Kindling for the Master"
5. Orange Juice - "Blokes on 45"
6. Stellastarr* - "My Coco"
7. Grand National - "Cherry Tree"
8. The Slits - "I Heard It Through the Grapevine"
9. Goldfrapp - "Satin Chic"
10. The Greens Keepers - "Lotion"
11. DataRock - "Computer Camp Love"
12. Professor Murder - "Free Stress Test"
13. CSS - "Let's Make Love and Listen to Death From Above"
14. CSS - "Music Is My Hot, Hot Sex"
15. April March - "Chick Habit"
16. Of Montreal - "A Sentence of Sorts in Kongsvinger"
17. Architecture in Helsinki - "Do the Whirlwind"
18. Apples in Stereo - "Same Old Drag"
19. I Am the World Trade Center - "Love Tragedy"

MOE CAN THINK

1. Animal Collective - "Leaf House"
2. The Magnetic Fields - "When My Boy Walks Down the Street"
3. RJD2 - "Smoke and Mirrors"
4. Eisley - "Telescope Eyes"
5. Andrew Bird - "Skin Is, My"
6. Teenage Fanclub - "Cells"
7. Belle and Sebastian - "Meat and Potatoes"
8. Mike Doughty - "I Hear the Bells"
9. The Presets - "The Girl and the Sea"
10. Neko Case - "Margaret vs. Pauline"
11. Mates of State - "Along for Ride"
12. The Knife - "Heartbeats"
13. The Ditty Bops - "Short Stacks"
14. Bill Callahan - "A Man Needs a Woman or a Man to Be a Man"
15. Menomena - "Wet and Rusting"
16. Klaxons - "Gravity's Rainbow"
17. The Decemberists - "Mariner's Revenge Song"
18. The Good, The Bad and the Queen - "History Song"
19. The Polyphonic Spree - "Lithium"

MOE CAN ROCK

1. The Fiery Furnaces - "I Lost My Dog"
2. Louis XIV - "God Killed the Queen"
3. Spoon - "I Turn My Camera On"
4. The Coral - "Pass It On"
5. The Replacements - "Alex Chilton"
6. Ted Leo and the Pharmacists - "Me and Mia"
7. Need New Body - "Show Me Your Heart"
8. Aqueduct - "Growing Up With GNR"
9. Nada Surf - "Indochine"
10. Bishop Allen - "Empire City"
11. The New Pornographers - "The Jessica Numbers"
12. The New Pornographers - "High Art, Local News"
13. The Marbles - "Magic"
14. The Features - "The Idea of Growing Old"
15. Dogs Die in Hot Cars - "Lounger"
16. Dogs Die in Hot Cars - "Godhopping"
17. The Decemberists - "The Sporting Line"
18. M. Ward - "Right in the Head"
19. Cold War Kids - "Hang Me Up to Dry"
20. Amy Winehouse - "You Know I'm No Good"
21. The White Stripes - "Icky Thump"