Online advertising: HEY DO YOU WANT TO BUY UNDERWEAR
Me: Hmm? Oh, no. I already did.
Online advertising: HEY DO YOU WANT TO BUY UNDERWEAR
Me: No, I bought a sufficient amount.
Online advertising: HEY BUT UNDERWEAR
Me: Right. I actually use the internet for purposes other than underwear-purchasing.
Online advertising: HEY
Me: Yes? What?
Online advertising: LOOK HERE IS THE UNDERWEAR YOU WERE LOOKING AT
Me: Thanks. I know. I don’t need to see it again until it arrives in the mail.
Online advertising: THEY COME IN COLORS TOO
Me: You know, I’m actually typing in a sort of public space right now…
Online advertising: OUR ADS LOOK LIKE GAY SOFTCORE KINDA
Me: Yes, a lot of men’s underwear advertisements look that way.
Online advertising: IF YOU WERE LOOKING AT THIS PHOTO ON TUMBLR OR SOMETHING AT WORK YOU COULD GET IN TROUBLE
Me: You know, the page I’m on right now isn’t even remotely underwear-related…
Online advertising: HERE WE PUT A LADY IN THE AD IF THAT MAKES IT BETTER
Me: It really doesn’t.
Online advertising: LOOK THERE’S LESS LADY NOW.
Me: …
Online advertising: HEY.
Online advertising: HEY BET YOU’RE NOT LOOKING AT THE LADY NOW HA HA HA
Me: Gosh, this online dictionary site has a lot of banner ads.
Online advertising: HEY WHY ARE YOU EMBARRASSED ABOUT WEARING UNDERWEAR
Me: I’m really not, it’s just that—
Online advertising: HEY ARE YOU GOING ON VACATION MAYBE
Me: ...
Online advertising: HEY BUT UNDERWEAR
Me: [runs away, abandoning laptop at the coffee house]
Online advertising: HEY BUY SOME MORE UNDERWEAR
(And yes, I have written about this exact phenomenon before, but as it’s been said online far too many times this week, It is happening again.)
well at least it wasn't butt plugs
ReplyDeleteDo you speak from personal experience?
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