Sunday, January 10, 2010

In-N-Out Off-Menu: The Extended List

Between the official In-N-Out website and this nonsanctioned but entirely handy breakdown of off-the-menu eats, I and you and we all should now have a good understanding of what you can order at this burgarium that will actually result in edible food. But shouldn’t there be more? I thought so.

For you consideration:

Mr. In-N-Out: A standard Double Double molded into the shape of a little man, with the patty being the body, the cheese being hair and facial features and the bun being clothes and a little hat.

Atheist Style: Whatever you’d normally order at In-N-Out, but with the bible verses on the cups and trays being scratched out by the people behind the counter.

Wendy’s Chiliburger: Someone in kitchen has to drive to Wendy’s to buy chili to slather over an In-N-Out burger.

Fries Not Done: Sliced raw potatoes, unsalted and served to you apologetically.

The Taco Fabuloso: A regular burger, sans a top bun and with the bottom bun curved into a makeshift taco shell into which the meat, sauce and vegetables are stuffed.

With Contempt: Again, standard In-N-Out menu items, just served by employees permitted to disregard the otherwise mandated cheerful attitude.

The Deuce: A single, cooked beef patty wad is dropped into your fountain drink.

Props to anyone who can convince In-N-Out employees to prepare any of these.

1 comment:

  1. HA! The deuce? Amazing. Your blog never ceases to make me laugh or think...even when I don't comment because my work internet connection won't let me.