Thursday, July 31, 2008

Quantum of... Gonzales?

The curse of the clunker title has once again struck someone involved in the production of the new James Bond movie. Or so I’d like to think.

I read yesterday that Quantum of Solace’s theme song will be performed by Jack White and Alicia Keys. This makes me very happy, as I loved Chris Cornell’s performance of the Casino Royale theme, especially in conjunction with the visual effects, which, would sound terrible on paper — “It’s a war between these different card suits, and this one gets shot with a spade and then spills out all these hearts” — but on the screen looked amazing. And I don’t even like Chris Cornell.

However, thinking of Jack White and Alicia Keys singing the Quantum of Solace theme, I’m amused by the difficulties of rhyming the word “solace” with anything. I tried making a short list of possible rhymes and came up with this:
  • ball us
  • brawl us
  • maul us
  • call us
  • Gonzales
  • Paul, us
  • stall us
  • thawless
  • Cialis (as a stretch)
And some others that were even worse. Of course, Cornell’s song was titled “You Know My Name” and not “Casino Royale,” breaking the tradition of most Bond themes having the same name of the movie they’re attached to.

Here, by the way, is that Casino Royale intro:


  1. See, I really liked the animated opening of Casino Royale but hated the song by Chris Cornell that went with it... and I even liked his solo stuff awhile back. I just thought it was completely subpar to the other Bond film themes. Many of which are hard to beat.

  2. Anonymous1:09 AM

    Hey Drew,

    You're half right. But I agree with euphoria -- the animated opening of Casino Royale was pretty sweet but the Chris Cornell song was weak. I LOVED that movie. Perhaps my favorite Bond film ever (until the new one comes out). But that song sucked. Bring back Shirley Bassey!

  3. I was going to follow up with "...from the dead?" but then I realized that Shirley Bassey is actually still alive and not nearly as old as I thought she was. And also more Welsh than I thought she was.