Wednesday, March 14, 2007

But I Only Smoke Benson & Hedgehogs, Doctor

Today Spencer delivered the first and only Santa Barbara post he's ever seen on Best of Craigslist: "Bohemian gentle-man with tent offers tent show nightly."

The text — too goo to be true, as you might expect — reads as follows.
My name is duane and I am a nice guy who happens to be broke at the time. The good news is that I am non-violent, a nice guy, endowed, std free, and if it doesn't work out, I plan on moving to Chicago in the spring. If you want to join me for theatre and symphonic events (I have press priveleges to most happenings here) excursions out to nature, wineries, the islands, intimate conversations with a good listener, etc. give me a call, email, or postcard to my p o box. "Life is either a daring adventure...or nothing. -Helen Keller. "If you're not enjoying your life, then you're missing the point" -some customer at Nordstrom's I had last fall. Ja, Duane PS: Can I sleep in your backyard either romantically or platonically? We could pretend we're boy-girl scouts and you think you've got some nasty bug on your body and you need me to kiss, lick, caress, massage it off. Or, for lack of a doctor, I could examine your body, as I have a first aid merit badge.
The original post, complete with inexplicable graphic.

1 comment:

  1. That graphic is actually used on the cover of the book "The Secret Language of Birthdays." I would guess its some sort of faux-woodcut thing, but weird that I have definitely seen it before.

    Finally! SB breaks into the Best Ofs!