Thursday, January 26, 2012

Snow White and the Five Clones

For me, so far, 2012 is the year of Zooey Deschanel, and per her demands, my every waking minute is devoted to her — her beauty, her style, her effervescent personality, all her good qualities, always good things, always, always, good and not bad, because if I don’t think happy thoughts Zooey will upon me with her Light of Judgement, which she fires from on high and which burns pure.

Ahem.

(I have issues with Zooey Deschanel.)

But in my little post on Dennis “The Beeper King” Duffy and the guy from Burn Notice, a commenter noted that my tendency to spot famous lookalikes wasn’t strange because she feels that Deschanel looks like Katy Perry. I totally agree. More than once, I’ve had to stop and make sure I was looking at the actress who can also sing (Deschanel) and not the marginal singer who can marginally act (Perry). And that’s not all. Here, then, I’d like to present Zooey Deschanel and the six women that I’d like to think she had surgically altered, should some various world government, fearing her power, decided to take her out.

Here you go:


Starting from the top left, and moving clockwise: The Deschanel, Anna Friel (the one from Pushing Daisies, who actually think looks the most like Zooey and whose Pushing Daisies promo shots look remarkably like Zooey’s New Girl shots), Katy Perry, Lizzy Caplan (Mean Girls, Party Down and now New Girl, oddly enough), Emily Blunt (stern looks, stole Jim from The Office from America) and Mia Kirshner (The L Word, Black Dahlia).

I’m not saying all of these women look alike, but I am saying that they all exist along the Zooey Deschanel continuum of light skin, dark hair and bright eyes. Any one of them could play another in a biopic (except Perry b/c is awful), and for each I’ve had done a double-take at least once.

And before I open up the floor to public opinion, a question: Why isn’t Anna Friel more famous?

People I think look alike (regardless of what you think):

12 comments:

  1. Two things:

    1) based on her recent SNL *host* appearance, I recommend a downgrading of Katy Perry's awfulness. Not that of her music, though.

    2) see also Alessandra Torresani (the original Ann Veal, Caprica). I actually thought your Mia Kirshner pic was of her before reading your piece.

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    Replies
    1. She's fine for hosting SNL, I guess. I just find her overall to be remarkably average.

      And that's a good point about Alessandra -- she definitely belongs in the club.

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  2. To answer your final question: I'm guessing it's because everybody thinks she's The Deschanel, as you call her :)

    Also, I never knew Katy Perry had attempted to act. The idea kind of frightens me, to tell you the truth. Oh, and I agree that Katy and The Deschanel look kind of alike, although the former really is a porn-ish version of the latter, don't you think? Not sure if I mean that in a good or bad way...

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    Replies
    1. See, to me, Perry isn't even sexual. She's... how an eight-year-old girl would imagine a sexy lady, which is to say an exaggerated physical sense that borders on drag queen-y but without the ability or desire to actually be womanly.

      Delete
  3. Can we make requests for other people? Because I swear Jesse Eisenberg and Michael Cera are the same person (or at least the same character type, though I prefer the latter). Maybe your blog can become the number one site for celebrity comparisons?

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    Replies
    1. I have, in fact, made this mistake before. However, I think of Eisenberg as being the more serious, mainstream version of Cera, who can't get over his own self long enough to actually get into character. Maybe that's just me, though.

      Delete
  4. Anonymous10:13 PM

    I'm just glad brunettes are back in.

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    Replies
    1. Well, Snow White was the first Disney princess. And as 30 Rock pointed out, we had quite a run there with non-blonde Disney princesses.

      Delete
  5. I like Godaigamer's idea.

    Here are some more to consider:

    Geoff Stults http://www.imdb.com/media/rm55488512/nm0836176 and
    Timothy Olyphant http://www.imdb.com/media/rm1880726016/nm0648249
    AND
    Chris Cooper http://www.imdb.com/media/rm3014113280/nm0177933 and
    Brett Cullen http://www.imdb.com/media/rm1572453376/nm0191442

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  6. Anonymous12:48 AM

    Personally, I always thought that Zooey looked more like Robin Tunney.

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  7. Anonymous8:26 AM

    Robin Tunney is absolutely the older version of Alexis Bledel, it's scary!

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