Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Jenniphure

Most of the entries in the “Ha Ha — This [Subject’s] Name” series earned mockery for being named something that sounds like something sexual, dirty or both. But these criteria need not be met. Proof:


In addition to being being named (or at least choosing to call herself) “Jenniphure,” this woman disturbs me because she lists her day job as “child caretaker / magician’s assistant.” Frankly, I worry she will fatally saw children in half, then toss her “blonde” hair and give off a giggly, Chrissy Snow-style “Oops!” Also: Is listing a woman’s hair color necessary when her photo indicates it well enough? Also also: But that’s not her actual color. Also also also: She has one tenture. Just the one.

8 comments:

  1. She's also got boots coming out of her butt.

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  2. Anonymous2:15 PM

    Luckily, the people that pay her a significant amount of money to practically raise their children feel that she is an excellent caretaker for their children. The girl makes more money in 2 days caring for children than I make in a week and I have a master's degree and an excellent job.

    Jenniphure, has been a blonde since birth. Her hair was so blonde as a small child that it looked white. It's really is funny that people spend their time making fun of people who are just doing a job.

    As a magician's assistant, she traveled to Korea to perform for the troops and their families that were stationed over there. The soldier’s children were excited to see the magician. At least she was able to bring some hapiness to American children in Korea.

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  3. Okay, you got me on her being blonde. And since you apparently know this woman, you're free to call me out on any point you'd like. But I stand by the idea that her unusual name spelling is open to interpretation and the combo of cheerleader/magician's assistant/babysitter might rub some parents the wrong way.

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  4. Anonymous10:06 PM

    More importantly she's a cheerleader for the New York Jets.

    Sheldon: And on a different but not unrelated topic, based on your current attempts to buoy my spirits, do you truly believe that you were ever fit to be a ‘cheerleader’?

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  5. Wait, who is Sheldon?

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  6. Anonymous10:10 PM

    Dr Sheldon Lee Cooper.

    Also Switchblade Sisters is a 1975 action / exploitation movie - "Mother's lock up your sons."

    Scissor Sisters are a Gay Dance Band.

    I'm in Australia - where's my Wild Turkey.

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  7. Oh. I thought I was Sheldon. Or you were replying to invisible comments.

    Check you mail for your whiskey in a week. Do you take it neat?

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  8. Anonymous10:18 PM

    No I was just using circular referential tools that co-exist between Jenniphure (stupid spelling; hot chick) being a 'cheerleader' and a great line from TBBT.

    No. There is nothing neat in consuming a spirit without Coca Cola and ice - no-one downs a neat spirit without making a screwy face and saying 'smooth.'

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