So I think one of our nation’s finest natural resources is woefully underused.
I have this great idea for a new show called "Burn Victim Parade". You have burn victims come our and show their hideous, fire-spawned deformities and then viewers call in and vote on which ones deserve reconstructive surgery the most. It’ll be great. Also, I have an idea for a version of the opera Figaro performed entire by burn victims. It’s called Disfigaro.